I kissed a woman. I had never experimented nor even been curious about other women, and yet, on this day that I kissed her, I knew with all certainty that I liked it.
I didn’t know what to expect when she helped me to close my eyes, lightly brushing her fingers over my lids and gently leaning me back on to the thin yoga mat. She had then patted my loose curly hair off my face, and her soft touch helped me to ease under her spell. Instantly my eyelids had stopped fluttering and I closed them peacefully as I gave into being cradled.
In her arms, I felt comforted and safe, and I slowly let go as my mind started to drift off. She was counting backwards, and it is only when she came to the number five that I came to the deepest realisation of my life. A realisation that was so shattering to my normal thought processes, so distinctly different than my everyday prejudices, that had I not let go of the constant bombardment of thoughts and restrictions, I would have bolted upright and ran out of the studio. But, I had been lulled into a deep state of relaxation which freed my mind of prejudice and allowed Graciela to take charge of my body.
With her strong hands cradling my head, I could smell the faint smell of perfume lavishly splashed on to her wrists. It was the exotic smell of myrrh and patchouli. I turned my face towards her nearest wrist, raising my head slightly so that my cheek could graze her knuckles. With my eyes closed, I was acutely aware of all sound, and I heard as she inhaled sharply. I must have communicated to her, because without word Graciela quickly slipped one of her exquisitely defined calves between my open legs, sliding her big toe down the inner part of my thigh. The loose fabric of her yoga pants tickled at the taut lycra pants that I wore, like a guitar pick over strings, causing a wave of desire to ripple through my body. My nipples became erect and I flushed in embarrassment, but my eyes seemed to be glued shut and so I kept them closed.
Over me, Graciela’s long loose curls fanned over my face and the heat helped to release the clean scent of her shampoo; it was intoxicating. All of my senses were on fire. There, on my back, I could hear her heart beat; strong even beats that played in rhythm to the more erratic pulse of mine. Graciela placed my head squarely on the mat and then reached down to lift both of my arms above my head, causing me to arch my back pushing my breasts high reaching towards her. Her body now over me, I could feel as her torso slid over my hardened nipples pulling them upwards with her movements. She placed my palms face up and her fingers found mine. With movements that seemed innate, I quickly grabbed onto her fingers and held on like a newborn.
Between my thighs, my body began to ache for her touch, and she having sensed it, slid her knee firmly between my legs. The sweetest spasm came over me, and I almost heard myself groan in delight. Again and again, Graciela stabbed her knee into me, and again and again I groaned and writhed onto her leg.
I couldn’t get enough. I wanted to hold on to her leg and ride it up and down like a see-saw.
With great desire, I pulled her down on top of me. I could feel the hard muscles of her belly sinking into my much softer flesh. Skillfully, she slid the smoothness of her neck over my lips, causing them to part, and in my desire to taste her, I began to suckle on the warm flesh there.
I became aware that Graciela was removing my shirt, and I struggled against her slow movements. She was driving me mad, trailing the contours of my body with the soft tip of her tongue, only lingering at my navel and midway between my breast bone. With my shirt off, she wasted no time in pulling the folds of my breasts out of my bra, by sucking at the skin until my nipples peeked out over the top. I felt her hot wet lips descend on my nipples, until they were erect and aching. Between her firmly clenched teeth, she grazed on them, squishing them between her tongue and teeth. Again, I heard myself groan in delight.
Graciela had already taken her shirt off it seemed, and with my closed eyes, I ran my hands along her ribs and up until I found her breasts. They were small girlish breasts compared to mine , but her nipples were large and hard, causing me to desire them even more. Graciela moved quickly over me, stroking my cheeks with her nipples, and like a baby I turned towards the stimulation pulling the nipple with my thumb and forefinger to my mouth. I sucked on her much like a calf might on the teats of a cow. The strong rhythmical movements caused her to press her own groin down into mine, and soon she too began to groan and scream, throwing her head back. In my ears, she cried out in pain and tried to pull her nipples away, but I had found the source of my pleasure, and I sucked forcibly.
Still latched on to her, I wrapped my legs around her feeling her rock back and forth onto me, and then in a frenzy of passion she slid down to find my mouth. Her lips soft against mine forced me to open my mouth, and her tongue slid inside finding the narrow pockets between my teeth and cheeks. Over and over our tongues danced, intertwining and slipping over each other, and we swallowed at the air in our mouths tasting the sweetness of palate and gum.
In my own mouth, I could taste the strawberries I had eaten before coming to class, and I knew she liked my taste as her kisses were so fervent. Holding on to her muscular buttocks, my body was on fire with the desire to feel her sink further into me. Graciela pushed her hard pubis into me, causing deeper and stronger spasms to wash over me, and I heard my own loud screams in my ears.
My screams were so loud they broke the silence of the room. A wave so strong washed over me and my eyes popped open at the same time that I heard Graciela telling me that she’ll see me again on the 17th .
I was still lying on my back, but now my eyes focused on the lights that we’re being switched on in the room. Around me other women were slowly rolling off their mats; some already heading out the door. I looked around frantically. Who had heard me? Who had seen us? No one was looking at me, so with a very loud exhalation of relief I realised that I had been dreaming. Thankfully no one had heard me, but it had seemed so real, and even now I could feel the sweet spasms between my legs.
With another loud sigh, I prepared to get up, but then I heard Graciela’s voice coming from behind me.
“You can let go of my fingers now, ” she said.
It took me a second to realise that I still had been holding her finger; at least that part had really happened, I surmised. Quickly, I let go and turned my face away so she wouldn’t see my embarrassment.
“I am so sorry. I guess I got carried away,” I stammered.
“No problem, it happens sometimes when you reach a deep state of relaxation. That is when you become aware of your deepest emotions and desires.”
“Well, I think I went to sleep clutching onto your hand. Thanks again.” I began to roll up my mat, and turned to look up at Graciela standing over me. “So the next class is on the 17th. Right?”
Graciela tapped her forehead with her hand, “Oh damn, I forgot to tell everyone. I changed the schedule. Hey, how did you know that?”
I was dumbfounded. Indeed, how did I know that? Now I wasn’t sure what had taken place. I couldn’t just ask her. I tried to push the thoughts out of my head. Of course nothing had taken place in this public room. Was I going crazy? I had never desired a woman in my life, and yet what was this feeling I had standing there next to her?
As always, Graciela and I were the last to leave the YMCA, walking together in the silence of familiarity. We were not exactly friends, but we had gotten to know each other pretty well, and sometimes we shared a cab.
On the street corner, Graciela stopped at a Korean deli while I waited for her. She came back with a small cup of fruit and passed the cup to me. She had chosen the biggest juiciest strawberries, and I took one telling her how much I loved strawberries. I sucked down hard on the fruit causing it to explode its sticky juice all over my face and her hands. I watched as she lifted her hands and stuck her tongue out to lick the juice from her fingers, while I flicked mine out to catch the drops from the corners of my lips. Our eyes caught each other’s, and we kept them locked until she burst out laughing, breaking the tension.
“You’re going to taste like a big strawberry, ” she joked. I couldn’t help it, so I had to turn away as I could feel my cheeks tighten. She hadn’t noticed, but I was acutely aware of the change in her voice. “You know what is so interesting? I don’t generally eat strawberries, but during class I had such an intense craving for them. At one point, I felt as if a strawberry was rolling around in my mouth.”
It was at that moment that a noisy yellow cab beeped its horn and pulled up to the curb. She offered to give me a ride, but I said I had some errands to run. I watched as she got into the taxi, and as I turned to walk away, I heard her laughter calling after me. “Ouch. Next time don’t suck down so hard.” I know I wasn’t dreaming as I saw her hand slowly slide down her throat and over her tiny perfect breasts before she disappeared.
Copyright © 2014 Susan M. Wolfe~All Rights Reserved